"So it's not gonna be easy, it's going to be really hard; we're gonna have to work at this everyday, but I want to do that because I want you, I want all of you, forever, everyday..." Nicholas Sparks



Marriage is the union between a man and a woman that establishes rights and obligations between them, as well as between them and their children, and between them and their In-laws.

In marriage, there are ups and downs, one of which is the fear that having a child would affect the intimacy between the couple.



Twitter user, @kesenaopeyemi, shared her experience on how she addressed this fear. She emphasised on communication.

" when I discovered I was pregnant, I was afraid that having a child would affect the intimacy I shared with my husband. I told him about my fear and we became more intentional about building our intimacy by taking these steps:"



1. Being intentional about conversions with partner, and sharing weaknesses during and after pregnancy.

" I spoke to my husband about how I felt I was walking like a cow and he will laugh and say I was walking fine"

"...the day I don't feel like such a good mum because I was carrying my baby and she hit her head, I can tell my husband, and he will encourage me and point out the things I do great"



2. Taking deliberate actions to be intimate with one's partner. She buttressed this by giving an example:

" we put our daughter to sleep early everyday so that we can have our intimate conversations."



3. Being more intentional about having date nights just to keep the spark. She said they decided to go on a date every Thursday.

" the days we were broke, we would just buy snacks and take a walk in the park. After our baby came, we still continued our dates"





"It is not a lack of Love, but a lack of Friendship that makes unhappy marriage" Friedrich Nietzsche



A good marriage requires being intentional.